Granted, but then your boss informs you that you will be working in Washington D.C, Southeast Permanently and you park you 'G' and it gets stolen the first day.

I wish I was president of the U.S.

 

Granted, the pay might be nice ($250k), but then you'd have to settle getting bj's from ugly interns like Monica.

I wish I was retired.

 

Granted but you get really bored with life and die shortly after

I wish I could shoot a laser out of my kock (Dane Cook).

 

Granted, but you'd invest all your retirement money in Microsoft just as the government shuts them down for treason, turns out theyve been working for the Russians all along.

I wish today was Friday

 

granted but then you get notified that you have to work both saturday and sunday.


I wish I had a new job.

 

Granted but the new job is to slob on the ****

I wish The new blackberry was already out

 

Granted, now you can zap those kidney stones for your wife while you're f*cking her.

I wish my poop smells like perfume.

 

Granted, but then you will rub it all over your body and become known as "The Poop Slinger". Women will also take huges dumps on your chest forever!

I wish I had a six pack (of abs).

 

This one's already been done

 

You wanted a 6 pack of abs...Why can't he? haha...

 

i wish i had the fastest and best looking G35 in the world

 

Granted, but its like the movie "Shallow Hal", so only you see the best looking G35 in the world. Everyone else sees a ghetto azz honda civic with a super wing and bondo body kit!!

I wish I had a hot azz g/f with a great azz and big fake boobies!!

 

Granted, until you realized that she has an adams apple!

I wish I'm an oscar mier wiener

 

granted..... lol

I wish I wasnt so sober

 

Granted, but then you decide to drive and end up getting jail time for manslaughter and you end up selling me your G for a pack of cigarettes.

I wish I knew what I would want that hasn't already been wished for lol