The Unofficially Official 24 Thread!
Originally Posted by terryw
lol that was some funny sh*t, or so you think until tweeter cut his wiener off.
but ken you seem like you are really into that scene, you memorized and recited the whole god damn scene.
That avacado sh*t is weak though. more dominance was shown by that main character redneck that looks like the love child of devon and elvis, he turned his pocket inside out and had his b*tch hold it and follow him around all day.
but ken you seem like you are really into that scene, you memorized and recited the whole god damn scene.
That avacado sh*t is weak though. more dominance was shown by that main character redneck that looks like the love child of devon and elvis, he turned his pocket inside out and had his b*tch hold it and follow him around all day.
T-Bag: All you gotta do sweetie is take this here pocket and all your problems will disappear, I guarantee.
Yeah I hope they stop killing everyone too. There are not that many ppl left to kill, but I do agree, that Miles character has to go and so does that hot looking chick who needs that psychiatric therapy who also reported Miles for sexual harrassment
I also think that Audrey should have killed Chris Henderson to get her revenge for her father.
I also think that Audrey should have killed Chris Henderson to get her revenge for her father.
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heh I wondered when a thread about 24 would surface. Best damn show ever! the only thing I look forward to watch on tv. This season is a bit more predictable than I would like, but still total awesomeness.
Outrageous, yes, but somehow not that crazy, its funny how this season carries so many similarities to the current administration, especially since its on fox. Its too bad Audrey didnt die in last episode, that would have fueled Jacks rage to new extremes. I have heard rumors that they will finish the next season with a 2hr movie in the theaters, which would be very cool as they would be able to show more hard core scenes... more torture! And one more thing ... bring back Kim damn it!
Originally Posted by yacoub
love '24'. This season has had the most outrageous plot yet though. ;p
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kim cant act for sh*t 
its true, shes just hot as hell, and she was a **** star in "the girl next door." in 24 however, her role is limited to a repetition of hiding behind dumpsters from bad guys and getting kidnapped by bad guys.
its true, shes just hot as hell, and she was a **** star in "the girl next door." in 24 however, her role is limited to a repetition of hiding behind dumpsters from bad guys and getting kidnapped by bad guys.
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So Jack is a plane hijacker now lol. I loved it when he said, "If you dont cooperate, people are gonna start dying"
unfortunately now that Logan knows about Karen Hayes, looks like Miles will be taking over CTU by next episode
unfortunately now that Logan knows about Karen Hayes, looks like Miles will be taking over CTU by next episode
Yeah last nights episode was crazy. Jack Bauer, the plane highjacker...lol. Also what kind of cell phone service does he have...he is getting calls while in the cargo hold of the plane and then in the main cabin...Mine craps out in the elevator @ work...I need to get his service plan 
Then he took out an air marshall as well. Then he causes the plane to have turbulence...this guy really is superman
Then he took out an air marshall as well. Then he causes the plane to have turbulence...this guy really is superman
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Top Sixty Facts about Jack Bauer
1. If everyone on "24" followed Jack Bauer's instructions, it would be called "12.
2. If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Nina twice.
3. Upon hearing that he was played by Kiefer Sutherland, Jack Bauer killed Sutherland. Jack Bauer gets played by no man.
4. If you wake up in the morning, it's because Jack Bauer spared your life.
5. When Kim Bauer lost her virginity, Jack Bauer found it and put it back.
6. Jack Bauers calendar goes from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Jack Bauer.
7. Superman wears Jack Bauer pajamas.
8. Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys.
9. Jack Bauer played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
10. When life gave Jack Bauer lemons, he used them to kill terrorists. Jack Bauer f@#$*&@ hates lemonade.
11. 1.6 billion Chinese are angry with Jack Bauer. Sounds like a fair fight.
12. Finding Nemo would have been vastly more exciting had Jack Bauer been looking for him.
13. Jack Bauer once won a game of Connect 4 in 3 moves.
14. Osama bin Laden's recent proposal for truce is a direct result of him finding out that Jack Bauer is, in fact, still alive.
15. Lets get one thing straight, the only reason you are conscious right now is because Jack Bauer does not feel like carrying you.
16. Jack Bauer was never addicted to heroin. Heroin was addicted to Jack Bauer.
17. If it tastes like chicken, looks like chicken, and feels like chicken, but Jack Bauer says its beef. Then it's f@#$*&@ beef.
18. Jack Bauer is the leading cause of death in Middle Eastern men.
19. When Jack Bauer was a child, he made his mother finish his vegetables.
20. Jack Bauer once double teamed a girl by himself.
21. Jack Bauer doesn't miss. If he didn't hit you it's because he was shooting at another terrorist twelve miles away.
22. Jack Bauer beats Asians in Dance Dance Revolution.
23. There are no such thing as lesbians, just women who never met Jack Bauer.
24. Simon Says should be renamed to Jack Bauer Says because if Jack Bauer says something then you better f@#$*&@ do it.
25. Killing Jack Bauer doesn't make him dead. It just makes him angry.
26. When President Palmer quit to start doing Allstate commercials, it took him 43 takes before he could stop saying, "You're in good hands with Jack Bauer".
27. Jack Bauer killed 93 people in just 4 days time. Wait, that is a real fact.
28. Every mathematical inequality officially ends with "< Jack Bauer".
29. Jack Bauer's favorite color is severe terror alert red. His second favorite color is violet, but just because it sounds like violent.
30. If Jack Bauer misspells a word, your dictionary is wrong.
31. When you open a can of whoop-***, Jack Bauer jumps out.
32. Your attraction to Jack Bauer in no way affects your sexual orientation.
33. When Google can't find something, it asks Jack Bauer for help.
34. You can lead a horse to water. Jack Bauer can make him drink.
35. Jack Bauer can get McDonald's breakfast after 10:30.
36. If Rosa Parks was in Jack Bauer's seat, she'd move to the back of the bus.
37. Jesus died and rose from the dead in 3 days. It took Jack Bauer less than an hour. And he's done it twice.
38. In the short time Jack Bauer was dead, he tortured the Devil and found the secret to immortality....and before he left hell to come back to life, he bitch slapped Nina Myers one last time.
39. Superman's only weakness is Kryptonite. Jack Bauer laughs at Superman for having a weakness.
40. In 96 hours, Jack Bauer has killed 93 people and saved the world 4 times. What the f@#$ have you done with your life?
41. Jack Bauer got Hellen Keller to talk.
42. When the boogie man goes to sleep, he checks his closet for Jack Bauer.
43. When Jack Bauer signs up for a free ipod online, they actually give him one.
44. Jack Bauer once killed so many terrorists that at one point, the #5 CIA Most Wanted fugitive was an 18-year-old teenager in Malaysia who downloaded the movie Dodgeball.
45. Jack Bauer won the Tour de France on a unicycle to prove to Lance Armstrong it wasn't a big deal. He thinks yellow wristbands are gay.
46. In kindergarten, Jack Bauer killed a terrorist for Show and Tell.
47. Guns dont kill people, Jack Bauer kills people.
48. When Jack Bauer smokes pot, the pot gets high.
49. What color is Jack Bauer's blood? Trick question. Jack Bauer does not bleed.
50. Jack Bauer removed the "Escape" button from his keyboard. Jack Bauer never needs to escape.
51. Jack Bauer knows Victoria's secret.
52. Jack Bauer has been to Mars. Thats why theres no life on Mars.
53. If Jack and MacGyver were locked in a room together, Jack would make a bomb out of MacGyver and get out.
54. Jack Bauer literally died for his country, and lived to tell about it.
55. James Bond has a license to kill. Jack Bauer don't need any licenses.
56. People with amnesia still remember Jack Bauer.
57. "Jack Bauer" is Arabic for "I'm f@#$^*".
58. When Jack Bauer goes to the airport and the metal detector doesn't go off, security gives him a gun.
59. If Jack Bauer was gay, his name would be Chuck Norris.
60. It would only take 1 bullet for Jack Bauer to kill 50 Cent.
1. If everyone on "24" followed Jack Bauer's instructions, it would be called "12.
2. If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Nina twice.
3. Upon hearing that he was played by Kiefer Sutherland, Jack Bauer killed Sutherland. Jack Bauer gets played by no man.
4. If you wake up in the morning, it's because Jack Bauer spared your life.
5. When Kim Bauer lost her virginity, Jack Bauer found it and put it back.
6. Jack Bauers calendar goes from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Jack Bauer.
7. Superman wears Jack Bauer pajamas.
8. Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys.
9. Jack Bauer played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
10. When life gave Jack Bauer lemons, he used them to kill terrorists. Jack Bauer f@#$*&@ hates lemonade.
11. 1.6 billion Chinese are angry with Jack Bauer. Sounds like a fair fight.
12. Finding Nemo would have been vastly more exciting had Jack Bauer been looking for him.
13. Jack Bauer once won a game of Connect 4 in 3 moves.
14. Osama bin Laden's recent proposal for truce is a direct result of him finding out that Jack Bauer is, in fact, still alive.
15. Lets get one thing straight, the only reason you are conscious right now is because Jack Bauer does not feel like carrying you.
16. Jack Bauer was never addicted to heroin. Heroin was addicted to Jack Bauer.
17. If it tastes like chicken, looks like chicken, and feels like chicken, but Jack Bauer says its beef. Then it's f@#$*&@ beef.
18. Jack Bauer is the leading cause of death in Middle Eastern men.
19. When Jack Bauer was a child, he made his mother finish his vegetables.
20. Jack Bauer once double teamed a girl by himself.
21. Jack Bauer doesn't miss. If he didn't hit you it's because he was shooting at another terrorist twelve miles away.
22. Jack Bauer beats Asians in Dance Dance Revolution.
23. There are no such thing as lesbians, just women who never met Jack Bauer.
24. Simon Says should be renamed to Jack Bauer Says because if Jack Bauer says something then you better f@#$*&@ do it.
25. Killing Jack Bauer doesn't make him dead. It just makes him angry.
26. When President Palmer quit to start doing Allstate commercials, it took him 43 takes before he could stop saying, "You're in good hands with Jack Bauer".
27. Jack Bauer killed 93 people in just 4 days time. Wait, that is a real fact.
28. Every mathematical inequality officially ends with "< Jack Bauer".
29. Jack Bauer's favorite color is severe terror alert red. His second favorite color is violet, but just because it sounds like violent.
30. If Jack Bauer misspells a word, your dictionary is wrong.
31. When you open a can of whoop-***, Jack Bauer jumps out.
32. Your attraction to Jack Bauer in no way affects your sexual orientation.
33. When Google can't find something, it asks Jack Bauer for help.
34. You can lead a horse to water. Jack Bauer can make him drink.
35. Jack Bauer can get McDonald's breakfast after 10:30.
36. If Rosa Parks was in Jack Bauer's seat, she'd move to the back of the bus.
37. Jesus died and rose from the dead in 3 days. It took Jack Bauer less than an hour. And he's done it twice.
38. In the short time Jack Bauer was dead, he tortured the Devil and found the secret to immortality....and before he left hell to come back to life, he bitch slapped Nina Myers one last time.
39. Superman's only weakness is Kryptonite. Jack Bauer laughs at Superman for having a weakness.
40. In 96 hours, Jack Bauer has killed 93 people and saved the world 4 times. What the f@#$ have you done with your life?
41. Jack Bauer got Hellen Keller to talk.
42. When the boogie man goes to sleep, he checks his closet for Jack Bauer.
43. When Jack Bauer signs up for a free ipod online, they actually give him one.
44. Jack Bauer once killed so many terrorists that at one point, the #5 CIA Most Wanted fugitive was an 18-year-old teenager in Malaysia who downloaded the movie Dodgeball.
45. Jack Bauer won the Tour de France on a unicycle to prove to Lance Armstrong it wasn't a big deal. He thinks yellow wristbands are gay.
46. In kindergarten, Jack Bauer killed a terrorist for Show and Tell.
47. Guns dont kill people, Jack Bauer kills people.
48. When Jack Bauer smokes pot, the pot gets high.
49. What color is Jack Bauer's blood? Trick question. Jack Bauer does not bleed.
50. Jack Bauer removed the "Escape" button from his keyboard. Jack Bauer never needs to escape.
51. Jack Bauer knows Victoria's secret.
52. Jack Bauer has been to Mars. Thats why theres no life on Mars.
53. If Jack and MacGyver were locked in a room together, Jack would make a bomb out of MacGyver and get out.
54. Jack Bauer literally died for his country, and lived to tell about it.
55. James Bond has a license to kill. Jack Bauer don't need any licenses.
56. People with amnesia still remember Jack Bauer.
57. "Jack Bauer" is Arabic for "I'm f@#$^*".
58. When Jack Bauer goes to the airport and the metal detector doesn't go off, security gives him a gun.
59. If Jack Bauer was gay, his name would be Chuck Norris.
60. It would only take 1 bullet for Jack Bauer to kill 50 Cent.
Last edited by NoG4Me; May 2, 2006 at 03:22 PM.
