So a vietnam veteran goes for a job interview. The team lead who is interviewing him is asking him all the typical interview questions...'why should we hire you', 'why do you want to work here' etc. So the interview goes really well and the other supervisor asks him 'well is there anything ELSE about you we should know??' The vet looks and says, 'well when I was in vietnam a mortar blew up next to me and Ive lost both of my *********, but thats about it.'

The lead and supervisor look at one another and wish to hire the vet on the spot, so they ask him to start monday at 9am. The vet was told the shift was an 8-5 shift, not a 9am shift so he asks 'Why do I come in at 9am when everyone else comes in at 8??' The team lead looks back and says 'well for the first hour, everyone just scratches their ***** so you can come in at 9am instead of 8.'

 

This one made me crack up as well....

Jim really doesnt wanna go to work on Monday morning so he calls his boss Steve. Steve answers the call and Jim tells him that he's not feeling really good and went to the doctor yesterday and they told him he has a real bad case of '**** glucoma.' Steve says 'WHAT??, **** Glaucoma??? What the hell is that??'. Jim replies 'I really dont see my a$$ coming into work today'

 

Its not really a work joke but...... Whats yellow and goes up and down?



















































A lemon in an elevator

 

hahaha wtf??!

 

lol nice jokes

 

you guys are a trip

 

what's the difference between an oral thermometer and an **** thermometer?










the taste.